Why I support marriage equality

Many US states and other countries have recently legalized gay marriage, or have started the process of legalizing it; the topic is definitely a hot debate.  It’s a topic that I get pretty worked up about, mostly because I don’t understand why so many people are against it. I guess I should also mention that I’m straight as an arrow; been in a happily committed relationship with a man for six years now. But, moving on, most people who are opposed to gay marriage site the bible as to why it should stay illegal. Really? The bible? I’m pretty sure that they bible also says you can beat your wife, and share her with your neighbor, and that it’s against God to cut your hair.  But somehow those teachings are overlooked. I’ve pretty much heard every argument there is, the bible being the one I brush off as irrelevant. Not everyone believes in the bible, and I believe this country was founded on the freedom of religion, or lack of religion for that matter.

This is about feelings, not human rights: That statement has to be one of the most ignorant things anyone has ever said to me; and yes, someone actually said that to me. Was it about feelings when women wanted to be considered equals with men, and be allowed to vote in the same manner that men had been doing for years? Was that just feelings? I think not. Was it about feelings when African-Americans held walks outs and sit ins in protest of their unfair treatment and lack of human rights? Nope, pretty sure that’s referred to has The Human Rights Movement. Marriage equality, gay marriage, whatever you want to call it; this isn’t about feelings, it’s about human rights.

Gay marriage will ruin the sanctity of marriage: Pretty sure straight people have been doing that for decades, centuries even. Do I really need to remind people about Britney Spears infamous 55 HOUR marriage? Or the wedding Kim Kardashian spent millions on, for a marriage that only lasted a few months? How many times has Elizabeth Taylor been married? Oh and let us not forget the common folk; there are plenty of people who are on their fourth or even fifth marriage. When I pointed this out to an person against gay marriage, they said “exactly, so why should we allow people to make it even worse?” Make it worse? Really? Maybe people have been watching too much TV, or they don’t live in a place that has a large Gay Community, but all of the gay people I know take their relationships pretty seriously. They are not that much different from straight people when it comes to relationships. You have your people who are afraid of commitment, and as a result don’t usually have committed relationships. Then you have your people who have been with the same person for years, decades. So please, tell me how the gay couple down the street from you, who have been together for 30 years, getting married somehow makes your straight marriage any less valid? Please…explain…I’m just dying to know.

Children need a mom and a dad: Oh this is my favorite. All single parents should be highly offended by this view. Children don’t need a mom and a dad; they need parents OR a parent to teach them to be decent members of society. Single dad, single mom, two moms, two dads; what difference does it really make as long as they love their children? I hate the gender roles argument too; that is such a stupid argument. No, a little boy does not need a man to teach him to be a man. I’m sure his mother will do a spectacular job teaching her son to be respectful to women; and a lot of men fail in that category anyways.  No, a little girl does not need a woman to teach her to be a woman. Most gay men I know have better fashion sense than I do, and can be the best shoulder to cry on when that mean boy broke some girl’s heart.

I guess I forget that I live in Portland Oregon, and Portland is a very special place. A place where people of all creeds, ethnicity, sexual orientation, and beliefs are embraced and encouraged to be who they are. I was very annoyed to hear of two bakeries in Gresham, a suburb of Portland, who refused to make wedding cakes for two gay couples.  Religious beliefs were their reasoning, and they also said they hoped a bill would be passed protecting their religious rights which would allow them to refuse services based on what their religious beliefs are. I really hope that doesn’t happen; what is our world coming to? If that actually becomes a law, next thing you know people will legally be allowed to turn people away based on their skin color and gender.

All I know is, if Charlie and I have the right to pursue happiness, everyone else should have that right too.

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